Why does being the good girl get you nowhere? You try and be kind, try not to upset people and try to tip toe round them, the second you put your foot down and rebel that actually you do wanna do something for yourself for a change, once in a blue moon. Suddenly you're selfish and it's not allowed. You think that people are like you, as you hate letting people down and being let down yourself, but it just surprises me how narrow minded people can be.
But then again they say the good guy NEVER gets the girl, so I guess maybe I'll be the nice girl from now on. Not a push over but considerate? Not too kind but kind enough?
I wish that I would stop getting so hung up on things and especially the ones about myself so much, there are so good things, right? Just with everything changing and best friends being hundreds of miles away, I don't know what to do. I guess I'm afraid that everyone is moving on and everyone is so happy and I'm just the kid trapped in the corner. In front of me is a glass door and I'm surrounded by keys, and then and again I think I've found the right key to unlock the giant padlock but it's just false hope. There's just this war going on in my head and when I finally think that this is what I want, it slips from my fingers. Now I know life isn't meant to be peachy, but I didn't realise it was this confusing either. x
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